Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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