he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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