Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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