I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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