What a fucking waste of an outfit
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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