So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
