Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
