Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
