Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
