dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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