How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
