I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
