She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
