his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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