I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize