so that wasnt chicken after all
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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