Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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