There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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