I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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