He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
