i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
