gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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