Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
