i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
