Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS