Texts From Last Night

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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.

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  (412): I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me. http://tfl.nu/826q
  Replies (131) Good night (14650) Bad night (1336)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20

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  (919): i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20 http://tfl.nu/xo20
  Replies (72) Good night (5548) Bad night (851)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.

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  (708): If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal. http://tfl.nu/hb9y
  Replies (19) Good night (4651) Bad night (1375)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.

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  (208): aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it. http://tfl.nu/sbum
  Replies (18) Good night (7317) Bad night (1339)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"

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  (508): You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper" http://tfl.nu/17it
  Replies (22) Good night (1361) Bad night (3342)
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  (760): View more from California

  double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors

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  (760): double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors http://tfl.nu/3oh4
  Replies (10) Good night (3697) Bad night (824)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.

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  (973): That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this. http://tfl.nu/9yd7
  Replies (10) Good night (2000) Bad night (921)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.

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  (716): I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone. http://tfl.nu/d9tx
  Replies (6) Good night (1649) Bad night (1030)
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  (949): View more from California

  I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.

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  (949): I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer. http://tfl.nu/vxsa
  Replies (4) Good night (685) Bad night (1008)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.

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  (615): I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/1nuc
  Replies (7) Good night (1086) Bad night (692)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.

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  (801): dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back. http://tfl.nu/m80x
  Replies (15) Good night (502) Bad night (1060)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry

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  (317): Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry http://tfl.nu/y5n9
  Replies (7) Good night (800) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts

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  (704): Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts http://tfl.nu/1f7h
  Replies (7) Good night (528) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover

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  (248): And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover http://tfl.nu/8g3o
  Replies (2) Good night (709) Bad night (277)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed

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  (517): I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed http://tfl.nu/w2px
  Replies (4) Good night (296) Bad night (596)

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