no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Randomize
