I will die if light touches me.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize