just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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