Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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