I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
When are your genitals available?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
