The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
