Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
