Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
