Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
He did a backflip because drugs
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
