If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
