i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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