I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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