I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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