He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
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Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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