: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
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