so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
