You're so nebulous sometimes
you would pick up someone in the library
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize