Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize
