what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
