Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
