Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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