Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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