i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
