i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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