your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
