i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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